Monday, May 21, 2012

The word busy does not explain it...

 I have been so busy trying to get things back in shape in this house. Over the last year I have been so stricken with sadness, grief, loneliness and longing that my home is...a mess. So I have been trying to get a few things ordered and organized. I am changing colors and decorating style...I need a change. A change that symbolizes the change in my life. So, I am looking for a few new items, a little new furniture and a lot of new paint.
  The painter was here for days trying to get the old wallpaper off the stairwell. We laughed and almost cried all at the same time! But the painting is done (for now) and now I can think about decorating..but not just yet...I am planning a little building..a little flooring...and well...then maybe the decorating will begin.
 I have heard from the flooring people and they may start tomorrow with tearing up some carpeting and maybe even some of the old hard wood. I know that it will be a mess..again but I am hoping this is the beginning of the end.
 I have not spent as much time as usual in my gardens because they remind me of all the flowers my Mom has planted and all the trees that are growing because of her....and then there is the building. I look at it and see all the work that my Dad did..all the stone he moved around and all the landscaping and before long I am no longer pulling weeds but instead I am surrounded by memories and the tears take me over...it has been such a year.
  I am trying to just slowly go on but it is like I am waiting for them to return from Florida and yet they are now so very late....but I am trying..I really am.
  Now, Back to decorating..the dining room is painted as is the living room, foyer, stairwell and hallway. Last week I painted the back porch and I may do a little something to the kitchen too...and I so hate to paint..lol. Once all the flooring is done then I will slowly decorate it will a more minimal style. I am going to do a make-over on my fireplace too...and that brings me great joy! And in the mist of all there is still life to live and a job to do and finally to fight through this grief with all my might...
  I am here and I visit you often...and I will try to post some pictures too. But for good day, my friends.

3 comments:

marly said...

Sounds like you are moving along and making decisions for your home which is good. Maybe next year your grief will be softened a little by time, and you can work outside and smile at the memories.

Holly Hills Primitives said...

Keep you chin up. Next month it will be one year since I lost my dad and I miss him every day. I also know he would want me to go on with my life and family, as I'm sure your folks would want too. It is so very hard, but I know you can do it! Have a good week, Dawn

Farmchick said...

Just stopping in to say hi...I know you have had such a struggle...try to let your memories comfort you. Come on over and say hi.