Well, Christmas is over and the new year is here but truly not much has changed. It is still the first Christmas without Mom and there is nothing to do about it. My family did their best to make my Christmas the best it could be and I love them for it. We had a wonderful Christmas together and we did spend time together and even watched old home movies..we laughed and we cried..and we were together. I will post a picture of something special I received a special present from my oldest daughter...it is such a treasure. But I just can't share the picture today..I am just too sad..but I will share.
My Mother adored Christmas. She would decorate her home and make crafts all year long getting ready for Christmas. When we visited her in Florida a few years ago..probably in January, she was painting winter scenes...again..Christmas. She would go with each of us to shop for our children so they would have great presents under her tree...we would pick things out for under her tree...we had so much fun...and she did too. When they stopped coming home for Christmas Mom would make sure we each got money in the mail for Christmas. It wasn't about the money but she wanted us to know that she loved us and had not forgotten about us at Christmas even though she was not there. So this year I guess Dad decided not to send Christmas money...but ya know..all my kids talked about was how much they missed their Maw Maw and how much time she spent with us...they didn't mention the money....they loved her so much. They knew that the money was always from her..her way of spreading her love. It is too bad that Dad didn't carry on the tradition in Mom's memory but he never did like Christmas..I guess I was just hoping he would honor her.
As I start to put my Christmas decorations away I am looking at all the things my Mom made for us. Quilts and paintings and so much more. What a joy she was to all of us. So now, we must somehow carry that joy with us...and send it into the next generation without her here but with her love ever close...she has covered all of us in a canvas of love and that is what we must take with us.
I will eventually find a special way to show my children and grandchildren that same love and acceptance and joy. That will be my legacy to them. So today I started to put a few things away thinking of all the memories I have with her...and how I cherish those memories and all the things she left behind...so you who craft and give to your children...just know that your children will find such comfort and love in those things when you are no longer with them...they will hold them and hug them and remember...they will remember....and they will love.
My Mother adored Christmas. She would decorate her home and make crafts all year long getting ready for Christmas. When we visited her in Florida a few years ago..probably in January, she was painting winter scenes...again..Christmas. She would go with each of us to shop for our children so they would have great presents under her tree...we would pick things out for under her tree...we had so much fun...and she did too. When they stopped coming home for Christmas Mom would make sure we each got money in the mail for Christmas. It wasn't about the money but she wanted us to know that she loved us and had not forgotten about us at Christmas even though she was not there. So this year I guess Dad decided not to send Christmas money...but ya know..all my kids talked about was how much they missed their Maw Maw and how much time she spent with us...they didn't mention the money....they loved her so much. They knew that the money was always from her..her way of spreading her love. It is too bad that Dad didn't carry on the tradition in Mom's memory but he never did like Christmas..I guess I was just hoping he would honor her.
As I start to put my Christmas decorations away I am looking at all the things my Mom made for us. Quilts and paintings and so much more. What a joy she was to all of us. So now, we must somehow carry that joy with us...and send it into the next generation without her here but with her love ever close...she has covered all of us in a canvas of love and that is what we must take with us.
I will eventually find a special way to show my children and grandchildren that same love and acceptance and joy. That will be my legacy to them. So today I started to put a few things away thinking of all the memories I have with her...and how I cherish those memories and all the things she left behind...so you who craft and give to your children...just know that your children will find such comfort and love in those things when you are no longer with them...they will hold them and hug them and remember...they will remember....and they will love.
4 comments:
I can't imagine your Christmas, all the memories you have and shared must be so precious. Stay strong, when you can and cry when you want. Know your mother is watching over you.
Blessings to you in 2012
How hard that has to be for you this year. So nice that you have so many wonderful memories and keepsakes from your Mom though. Cherish the memories! Best wishes for a happy new year!
Cathy
What a wonderful post!!! The true meaning of Christmas is about family and friends and not money.
I'm sure you have already started a legacy with your kids more than you know.
Oh i feel your pain my mum passed away on the 7th nov 2011 on my daughters 16th birthday she was dignosed 6 weeks before that ,,,though misdignosed for 18 months before that .. any how mum had just had her 67th birthday one month before she went , any way mums brother invited us to there farm fr christmas lunch and tried to make it a good day and like you i cried i tried to laugh but it was a hard day , my oldest whom is our only son as well we have 3 daughters he gave me a really special gift to that had me crying!! it was my memories growing up of how mum always made christmas such a special time that helped me to get through it for my children , its been 2 months now and the pain is just so raw i miss her more and more everyday!!
Happy healthy new years!!
Heidi..
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