Ohio Farm Girl

Really......

2012-01-26T23:41:00.000-05:00

Today as I was driving to work as I entered the exit ramp it seems my van decided to to give up...my van wouldn't move...at all!!!! Seems my van lost it's transmission. You have got to be kidding, just like that it was done. Now I had been thinking about getting something different in a few months but today that was not on my mind. I have not had time to test drive, I have not even decided for sure what I wanted. But today...my van died. I think today I have had enough.

About the Paint Choices

2012-01-26T14:42:00.000-05:00

Really..they are shades of gray. If you go to the Lowes site you may get a more true color. Just wait till you see them on the wall...I promise they are better than they appear!

Paint Choices

2012-01-26T08:56:00.000-05:00

Ok so some of you have asked what I am up to so I thought I would share my colors. These are the three shades I have chosen so far. They look much darker on the internet that they do in my hand.
The silver dust is what I think is going on the wall. I have to be very careful that it doesn't take on a pink cast since my woodwork is cherry. The seashell gray I think is going on the ceiling. My ceiling are very tall and I don't want them to make my room cold so I think a little darker shade will help. Filtered shade is going on the molding...or it is going to be a semi gloss white...not sure. But then that is why they are called testers, right!!!!!
I have three rooms that are open to each other so as of now this is the theme. I will not have a chance to get them on the wall until saturday unless I get a bust of energy after work..not likely! lol
I am always open to more ideas if you have them!!!!

Making some paint choices..

2012-01-25T21:49:00.000-05:00

Well I have finally chosen the paint for my dining room, my living room and my foyer. But just to be sure I bought test paint. So far I have not had the time to put the test paint on the wall...but I will this weekend. I can't wait to see them one wall during all times of the day. If I wasn't so tired I would get up and look up the names of the paint...sorry.

I have come up with a color theme..at least I think I have but I will keep that tight until I see the test paint.

I do have a few new things going on here but I can't share that just yet...but I will.
Hope you are doing well...we are doing fine too. I am ready for some warm weather....Georgia here we come!

Counting My Blessings!!

2012-01-21T09:07:00.001-05:00

I want to thank all of you for your prayers and sweet, kind comments. My family has had a rough few months and your prayers have surrounded us with love and protection. I know that you must be the most kind, compassionate friends I have have ever encountered.
Could I ask for your continued prayers as we go through the next few months? I will share what I can..but know there are struggles ahead and lessons to be learned and I know that God's mighty right hand has me in His grips!!!
We are doing ok and adjusting to a new normal but in the midst of the pain just know that I have felt your love and prayers surround me!

Thankful!

2012-01-20T21:01:00.000-05:00

Today we had our first measurable snowfall. We had better enjoy it because it is suppose to rain all next week.
Today was a good day...thank you Lord for all you do for me!

My Dad, Bucky Walter

2012-01-18T09:32:00.000-05:00

Well, my Dad is back from Florida and the preparations are made for the viewing today. What a terrible day this is going to be. My Dad was on the the most brilliant men I have ever met. He was a farmer but was constantly reading and studying and researching. He had a lot of perception when it came to dealing with people!
My Dad was a hard worker and an avid golfer. He was tough but had a way of surprising you with large gifts. My Dad didn't like Christmas and he didn't want to spend money or birthdays but when he gave, he gave big. Remember in 2008 when my parents paid to have a building built on my property? Ya, that was the way he gave. Dad and Mom spent 2008 and 2009 working at our home finishing the building and putting in a new driveway. Dad helped with all the landscaping and he and Mom we so happy to know that I have big plans for that building.
Dad never recovered from losing Mom. He was not himself. He could not figure out a way to find a new normal and at 80 years old he just gave up. Mom had taking care of him his whole life and without her he was lost.
The photo is of my daughter and my Dad when she graduated from the University of Findlay in May.
He was so very proud that yet another of his grandchildren had a college degree.
Mom was so determined to be at the graduation of our daughter and our other daughter graduated in June from High School. I am so thankful that they were both her for my children.
I really needed Dad to come home from Florida and try to get back to normal. We have all counted on him our whole lives but Dad was called home to be with Mom and now they are both at peace together.
We have already started to say out goodbyes, each in our own way. I have a long hard journey ahead of me. I am not sure how you recover from such a huge loss. The death of my parents is just unimaginable. I am going to need your prayers everyday. I am going to hold on to Jesus to lead me through this path of grief. I appreciate your kind words of love and support. Thank you for being there for me the last 5 months. God be with you.

Tragedy Strikes Our Family...

2012-01-14T14:53:00.000-05:00

Dear Friends, Yesterday my Dad went to be with the Lord. He had not been sick but he had been suffering since the loss of Mom just 5 short months ago. I truly believe he died of a broken heart. He had not recovered at all from the loss of Mom. She was his everything and he didn't really realize it until she was gone.
I know that they are truly happy together in Gods' arms but our hearts are devastated....shock..beyond belief. I do not have the words for this but rest assured I know that they are not suffering apart any longer.
My world was forever changed in August and now it changed again...forever. I am in such anguish. My Dad was in Florida and I just don't know if he could have returned to Ohio to all of her things again...Please pray for us at our lowest hour....we need all God has to offer to survive without them.

Gathering!

2012-01-11T18:56:00.000-05:00

I have been spending time trying to find the perfect paint color...colors. As most of you know I do not care for white ceilings and I also need a color for the moldings so I have been spending a lot of time at the paint store. I also have to consider that I have 3 rooms that enter into each other. So all the rooms are going to be painted and all the paint must be chosen before I begin because they have to co-ordinate.
Now, I need at least 4 or 5 colors...what a problem this has become. I found a color I liked but it was not on a color wheel so I have to find all the colors myself. I also have large woodwork that has a tint of red in the stain that causes come paint to look pink. So I think I have it narrowed down and will be going to get the paint on Friday and the painting will start on Saturday. One room for now until I get the wall paper stripped off. I am happy to get started on a project. I am just hoping I have found a color I can live with. We will see. ps...we can always repaint, right?

Your Ideas on a Make-over Needed!!

2012-01-08T16:49:00.000-05:00

I have been contemplating a make-over on my foyer for quite some time. before Mom got sick she was going to help me get this wall paper off the wall and paint it a nice shade of whitish--grayish something!! We talked and laughed but with 3 graduations in 2 years there was just not enough energy for all that. Once she got sick I never thought about it again. But now as I am putting the decorations away I am thinking that is time to make myself busy. This is the light that has hung in our foyer since we bought the house. I loved it's strange bulbs and how different it was. Now it just seems strange and ugly.

In behind you can get a taste of the wallpaper. I am ready for it to go!

There are some beautiful stain glass windows, woodwork and an open stair case that could make this room into a stunning entryway. I know that the lighting is bad but I think you can see that there is another window on the landing. The stairs are already just wood.

I am not sure about a paint color or anything else for that matter. If you would like to share your ideas for this room please feel free to let it all hang out....I could use some inspiration here!

Ending the year..beginning the next....

2012-01-02T18:37:00.000-05:00

Well, Christmas is over and the new year is here but truly not much has changed. It is still the first Christmas without Mom and there is nothing to do about it. My family did their best to make my Christmas the best it could be and I love them for it. We had a wonderful Christmas together and we did spend time together and even watched old home movies..we laughed and we cried..and we were together. I will post a picture of something special I received a special present from my oldest daughter...it is such a treasure. But I just can't share the picture today..I am just too sad..but I will share.
My Mother adored Christmas. She would decorate her home and make crafts all year long getting ready for Christmas. When we visited her in Florida a few years ago..probably in January, she was painting winter scenes...again..Christmas. She would go with each of us to shop for our children so they would have great presents under her tree...we would pick things out for under her tree...we had so much fun...and she did too. When they stopped coming home for Christmas Mom would make sure we each got money in the mail for Christmas. It wasn't about the money but she wanted us to know that she loved us and had not forgotten about us at Christmas even though she was not there. So this year I guess Dad decided not to send Christmas money...but ya know..all my kids talked about was how much they missed their Maw Maw and how much time she spent with us...they didn't mention the money....they loved her so much. They knew that the money was always from her..her way of spreading her love. It is too bad that Dad didn't carry on the tradition in Mom's memory but he never did like Christmas..I guess I was just hoping he would honor her.
As I start to put my Christmas decorations away I am looking at all the things my Mom made for us. Quilts and paintings and so much more. What a joy she was to all of us. So now, we must somehow carry that joy with us...and send it into the next generation without her here but with her love ever close...she has covered all of us in a canvas of love and that is what we must take with us.
I will eventually find a special way to show my children and grandchildren that same love and acceptance and joy. That will be my legacy to them. So today I started to put a few things away thinking of all the memories I have with her...and how I cherish those memories and all the things she left behind...so you who craft and give to your children...just know that your children will find such comfort and love in those things when you are no longer with them...they will hold them and hug them and remember...they will remember....and they will love.

Christmas Food...Hungry?

2011-12-20T09:05:00.000-05:00

The punch was ready when our family started to arrive...

Pasta salad done...

Eggs finished....a dash of cheese

Lots of goodies...

another salad...

And family...

More family...

The grandparents....(in the back)

Was good to have family over for the afternoon. This is my dh side of the family...somehow I missed getting any pictures of their 3 sons but believe me they were there! Now, I am almost ready for Christmas. This week is about finishing up, Christmas choir, Christmas play and finally Christmas day. It will not be the same this year. My heart is not in Christmas this year but now is all we have and I am trying to enjoy the season with my children....but I am missing Mom....

Christmas Bathroom Encore

2011-12-17T23:29:00.000-05:00

Yesterday when I posted my bathroom pictures I guess I forgot to turn around and take pictures of the other side so here is the opposite wall. You can see in the mirror the wreath from yesterday.

I leave the plate rack up year around and just change out the plates, if you are a follower you probably remember the fall plates!

I do believe the green stripes are my favorite.

I like for the bathroom to make you smile...maybe be unexpected...I enjoy decorating it!

I have a variety of towels but for today we have red snowflakes...

My spa sink...you either love it or hate it...I smile when I see it...soon I will tire of it and move on to something else.

I found this wreath at Jo Ann Fabric and could not believe it wasn't gone since it was on sale.

And my wonderful snowman that my Mother painted. Each of us has one. The nose winds up and plays frosty the snowman. I listen to it when I am in the shower....thanks Mom. She was a very talented person..she is missed.

Christmas in the bathroom!

2011-12-16T17:46:00.000-05:00

I found all these little Santa's at a garage sale a few years ago. Each year I try to find a special spot for them.This year is the bathroom.

I forgot the hang the sign behind them...It says Holiday Goods...sorry

This wreath my Mom made for each of us....I adore it.

A sweet little tree.

A little look at the tree and the light!

This is my little cross stitch from a few years ago!
I think the bathroom is coming together!!! Blessings

Grief in the Midst of Christmas

2011-12-14T09:15:00.000-05:00

This morning as I was listening to our practice cd for our Christmas choir, the ugly grip of grief put its' hands on my heart. While listening to these beautiful Christmas songs with wonderful music I am faced with the fact that this Christmas my Mother will celebrate in Heaven and not with her daughter. I am heartbroken at my loss. I walk around in a daze, trying to show the world I am normal when inside I am a shambles. My Mother, my best friend, the one person who always knew what to say and what to do, is gone...oh how heartsick that makes me.
I have a strong christian faith...I know she is with Jesus. I know she is ok...I know I will see her again...I am just living the reality of the effects of death.
Dear Friends, I know this is not the Christmas posts...today I don't feel Christmas. Today I only am feeling the pain of my loss. I am just selfish enough to want her with me...I am a spoiled child wanting my Mother. Her love for me was unconditional and true. I can not remember a single time my Mother ever raised her voice when speaking to me. Oh....I am heartsick today.
I know that when grief hits hard that sometimes it only lasts for a few hours...or days and then subsides but for today...right now...I am at my limit of control. So the tears flow and my heart hurts...oh what I have lost...but heaven has gained.
Lord, today I am asking for some mercy and grace, for an extra portion of love. Help me be close to you today, Lord. Wrap your arms of love around my soul...and I will pull myself together and go on with my day, maybe a little slower today but I am counting on You to pull me through...thank you Lord for your mercy right now!
Amen
Tomorrow I will feel better. Thank you dear friends for your loving support in my difficult time.

Oh Christmas Tree

2011-12-12T22:05:00.000-05:00

Well, the tree is trimmed..at last. It has seemed like such a big job, not because it was difficult just because I haven't felt like decorating it this year.

But I dug out the the vintage ornaments and just got started. I adore these old ornaments and I must admit they make me smile!!

I hope you enjoy my little pieces of heaven.Not the best pictures but you can get the feel for it!

I must admit that I am just finishing the decorating. But yet the front porch is not done so that is my goal for this week. I am going to get out there and see what I can do with a few new lights! We will see what happens once I get started....more pictures to come!

More Christmas Decorations

2011-12-10T09:23:00.000-05:00

Just a few more pictures. This is the window in my foyer. As you can see I have a wreath on the window outside and snowflakes on the inside. I can not put lights on this garland since I don't have any electric nearby,

I rehung the window behind my sofa and decorated it...I am not pleased with the decorations this year but to tell you the truth I am too tired to change it again so for now...

This is the wool garland I made last year after Christmas. I am leaving it in the dining room for this year I really love it. You can also see the Avon Plates I have hung. My Mother always got one each year for all of her dd. I cherish these plates. I leave them out all year and I think of her often when I see them.

Again,,,no so good this year!
More pictures tomorrow.

A few more Christmas decorations

2011-12-07T20:54:00.000-05:00

This is an area on the radiator that is in our computer/living room which is actually the real dining room.

I found this set of mercury glass candle sticks and they are just so beautiful that I could not resist. I took an up-close picture of the glam and it is the last picture in this post. It did not come out very well!

I hung up a small painting that my Mom painted a few years ago when I was in Florida with her. I can not tell you how much I miss her right now.She was in Florida when she painted this, but she was dreaming of an Ohio winter...I am dreaming of the day I get to see her again.

I put my silver tree in the foyer this year with all silver balls but when I looked it just did not look the way I wanted it to so my middle daughter talked me into using her purple balls. It makes me smile, how about you?

I am not sure you can even tell what this is but it is the close version of the candle sticks..
I am certainly not feeling like Christmas but in the midst of this heartbreak I know that my family needs me to remember that this is a special season and that we have to pull together to get through our loss. Some days it is such a struggle. I am thankful for the family that I have. I will post more pics tomorrow.

More Christmas pictures

2011-12-06T08:13:00.000-05:00

Well, I am almost ready for work but I wanted to share a little more of the living room. This is our front window it faces the road which is west. It takes all the wind so I have started to hang the wreath on the inside of our home. Somehow I am stuck on a snowflake them so I guess I am just going to go with it!! I spent most of the day yesterday working in this room! The tree I found at a garage sale!

This is a closer look at the snowflakes. They are wooden and I have had them for many years!

Sitting in the window is a star and from the outside it is way cool...it is kinda lame in this picture!

Off to the left is the buffet with the red striped trees and this is the rest of the design. I forgot to take a picture with it all together but I will do that later!

My bottle tree collection. I love them...not a good picture but I still love them. I hope you enjoyed this little tour and tomorrow I will show you some areas of glam and glitter!~

Now. the stocking are hung!!

2011-12-05T19:15:00.000-05:00

I finally dug out the stockings and put them in their places. I usually take down my wool hanging but for this year it is staying too. Nothing is too spectacular this year as far as the mantle goes but it will get better as I show more pictures this week. I promise!

This is the up close version of yesterdays pictures. I love this deer!!

I thought I would finish today but alas, I need more lights. Now how could all those strings of lights be burnt out? I know that I would not have packed them away that way. But anyways, this is my start. But more pictures to come each day~~~~ I am enjoying your pictures too!

Christmas Mantel ..the stockings aren't hung yet!

2011-12-04T16:09:00.000-05:00

This is the Christmas mantel this year but I have to find the stockings!! I decided to go with a primitive look in this room and that made it pretty easy. I have been working on other areas of my home and tomorrow I am going to finish the front porch!

I incorporated a small pot filler with my decorations...because I thought it was an important message!

I will try to take a different picture of this star. It has a cute reindeer head inside...you will love it. When I get the stockings up I will take a new picture of this too.

This is another little deer that I just love...a few more primitive items and then the lit candles! I know I am not that exciting this year but I am struggling with the loss of my mother and the going to be the first Christmas without her. I can not begin to tell you the cry of my heart. But Christmas is still coming and I have family and friends that count on me so I continue on in the spirit of Christmas.
I will share pictures again tomorrow of another area of my Christmas home. Blessings for you!

Take a Quick Look!

2011-12-01T08:27:00.000-05:00

I finally took a few quick pics because I have a dear friend who had asked me what I was up to. These are the trees I found on the 90% clearance rack. I was not sure but decided to take a chance and pick them up.
I had forgotten about them but when I went to the basement there they were and they are just too cute. Now this was an easy beginning!

We decided to go with out large tree this year and here is a picture without her ornaments. We are waiting till my daughter is home to put the ornaments on!

But you didn't think I would forget about my silver tree...lol. She is up and beautiful but you will have to wait to see her another day!

Christmas decorating begins! (soon)

2011-11-25T23:29:00.000-05:00

So the Christmas season is here. Now that work is out of the way for a few days I guess it is time to begin the transformation of our home for the season. Tomorrow I will drag out the tree from the basement and start decorating it from top to bottom....what fun we will have! I love old vintage ornaments and I will carefully dig them out.
Later in the day we are planning another Thanksgiving dinner..with some of my family. It will be nice to be together again.
There will be cookies and hot chocolate to help us set the stage but for tonight I will rest and relax. Tomorrow will be here quickly. Blessings to each of you.

Thoughts about Thanksgiving

2011-11-23T14:42:00.001-05:00

In my heart, this is what Thanksgiving feels like...a family sitting together and having a grand time just being together. We have to be thankful for what we are given because we only have today. I am thankful for my family.
For many years my Mother was not able to be with us during Thanksgiving and Christmas. My dad would leave for Florida around the first of November and never look back but oh how Mother missed being with us. I would call her during our day and we would chat and she would try to hide the sadness in her voice but I knew how she was feeling. She loved her children and grandchildren more than anything. She did not like going to Florida and being away from us so we missed so many days together. But how lucky we are that we all knew how she felt about us and she showed us often with her little notes and quick chats. What a blessing she was to us.

This will be the first Thanksgiving without my Mom. Even though she was in Florida she had a way of making our day special. Often she would buy the paper products and make little candy treats before she left and how could be forget those parkerhouse rolls she would make ahead of time...oh how yummy they were!!!
So I will now try to make the day special for my kids. Last weekend was my Mother's birthday and I was not about to let the day be forgotten so in honor of my Mom I bought each of my girls a present and from here on out they will get a present on her birthday always. It made me feel a little better knowing that we celebrated her day.
So this year I am going to be thankful for all those that choose to spend the day with me, I am thankful for the blessings that we have and the love we share. I have not forgotten all you who have been so kind to me during this time of heartbreak...I am so very thankful for you too.
May your day be filled with laughter and love...hold them close and kiss them...I am so very blessed.

Such a Sweet Reminder

2011-11-14T15:25:00.001-05:00

This weekend I had a small gathering of family over for a bonfire and crafting session. We were gathering all the items we needed and taking them to my shed. I had most everything I needed but I could have used another crock pot. I had 4 plugged in but still I needed one more. As I was finishing up the preparations I opened a cabinet in my shed and there was my Mother's old crock pot. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I do not remember her bringing it to my home but we had a birthday party for her last year and my guess is she left it so I could use it for the holidays.
This poor old crock pot is missing a handle and a little chipped and is the most wonderful thing I have seen in months. It is so like my Mom to always be thinking of helping someone else.
In this season of thankfulness I sometimes feel so bad that I forget about all my blessings. I have so very many. But for today I am so thankful for this old chippy crock pot. It reminds we of the loving and giving spirit of my Mother. She was with us as we sat around the fire and chatted...she was reminding me she is always there. Praise the Lord for His mercy and grace for without it I am nothing.

Framed and Finished...Finally

2011-11-10T12:33:00.001-05:00

When I started stitching this piece for my Mother last winter I never dreamed that she would not be here for her birthday to receive it. She watched this piece come together and I surprised her by adding her name to the bottom. She was so delighted.

So I found a place in my home to hang it and it will be a gentle reminder of her each day.

I think the framing turned out fine and since I am changing some of my rooms to a white i went with distressed frame. Mom would have wanted something with scrolls and I think she would have loved seeing it done. She did get to see the stitched piece done. I only had 2 stitches to do for it to be complete but when she passed away I decided it was complete minus the stitches.

This is a wall in my kitchen and for now it will hang here. I am going to write something on the back but right now I just have to let it be.

On the 19th I have decided that there is a new tradition that I want to start to celebrate her birthday even though she is in Heaven. I will share the details on her birthday. My Mother always made each one of us feel special on our birthday. She always would bake us her special cake and would either have a gift or some money for us to buy something special. She often would make a meal or come to our home to share the meal we were having but she was the type of person to always think of others. She wanted us each to know how much she loved us and she would take the opportunity to make it known on our birthday and on holidays. She was a kind, caring and gently person. I miss her. To you, Mom, with love.

Cardnal is back

2011-11-09T22:49:00.000-05:00

Remember when I was stitching this piece? Well, I did finish if for my Mom. She watched as I placed the stitches and was so surprised when I added her name to it. When my Mom passed away I only had 2 stitches to put in it but those 2 stitches will remain incomplete just like my Mother. Her life was not complete on this earth in our eyes but Jesus called her home and her journey now continues with Him. I just picked this piece up from the framers tonight but I can not bear to take the plastic off of it just yet. I will post a picture when I can bear to look at it. My Mother's birthday is November 19th and this was going to be her present. So, Mom, this one was for you...Dear Friends...I will post a pic tomorrow. With sadness I will leave this day behind.

My Project is Started

2011-11-06T19:13:00.000-05:00

My newest projects is finally started. I am working on an Advent Calendar that my dh bought me for my birthday. My eldest dd is helping me put them together. We spend last Sunday putting all the pieces into baggies so that it would be easier to find what we needed. All of the tags are laying on the table so they will look a little different when they are hanging but that will be when I get to the end!

I do not have them in any order and the jolly is in need of some bells but the paint was too wet to finish it.

We are having a delightful time being together and creating new memories. I had a weepy moment when I forgot Mom was gone. I had it in the back of my mind that she was in Florida and when my dd went to the other room for a minute I was going to call Mom and tell her what we were doing. She loved crafts and would have enjoyed this project. Just as I reached for my phone I realized she was gone and I just could not stop the tears in time for my dd to come back and catch me. But in the midst of all that I stamped one of the words upside down and so the tears turned into giggles for a minute. I miss her so much but I am trying my best to make new memories to help ease the hurt. I am so thankful for my children. Thankfulness helps get me through the days. I am thankful for all the time I spent with my Mom and all the time we spent on the phone while she would winter in Florida. I am so very thankful!

Her Last display for the year

2011-11-04T09:34:00.000-04:00

This is my beautiful tree this morning. She is showing her wear from all the rain we have had. She shows her beauty each year and I just love watching her make the change but I am sad when I see her get to this stage because it is almost over now.

This was her in full glory!
I am still gathering supplies for my Advent calendar but I promise to share the pictures as I put it together.
I have another full day of activity planned but most of what I do is so boring that I dare not share. I have things like the post office and the bank and sweeping and well you get the picture. But I am thankful for the beautiful weather we are suppose to have the next three days and I am going to enjoy each one with a walk and some outdoor work. I hope your day is blessed.

Extra large turkey and a little decorating

2011-11-03T15:21:00.000-04:00

Well, since it was so nice here today I decided that maybe I should work on some of those last minute projects that I need to do outside. I found my wooden turkey feathers that my Mom made for me and I found the biggest pumpkin that I have.This makes for a giant turkey and I think he is just so cute. He is just outside my back door,

Then I headed outside to mow and work on my shed. This is the building that my parents had built for me. I am having a few cousins come over and I thought I would give it a more living room feel so I took some decorations and headed out there. Since it is 61 degrees I actually didn't need much of a jacket either. When you leave my back door and head out to my shed this is what you see.

And when you are at the shed and look down the driveway it was a beautiful seen today.

You can tell that I mowed all the leaves up for now but there are many more to come. I just adore leaves and trees!!

Inside I did put up a few things and this is one of my new tables. This is where it will live for now but then I have plans for it!

When you walk out the front door this is what you see. I often sit on the front porch of my building and just enjoy. I miss my Mom. She was always here helping me get things ready for Thanksgiving and working on projects before she would leave for Florida. But alas, she is always with me, I am so thankful for that.

31 Days End But Thankfulness Begins!

2011-10-31T11:36:00.000-04:00

As our 31 Days come to a close, our days of being Thankful are just beginning. Today my bits and pieces of bats and carved pumpkins give way to turkeys and scarecrows and harvest angels. I found these lights that look like candles at a gift store and I knew that I had to have them. They are electric and filled with glorious light.

This time of year is such a struggle to know what decorations to leave up...but today I am doing the obvious and being satisfied with it.

Today I am thankful that I am spending time with my youngest as she studies for a test. We are together and happy and healthy. She hit the deer and could have been injured but instead we are together and chatting about nothing. I am thankful for the children and husband. May you find blessings in your day today!

Two New Projects Started for Day 30

2011-10-30T20:48:00.000-04:00

I am starting a new project that I found on the internet.One Lucky Day has an interesting advent calendar and they are selling the parts and pieces if you want to make one on your own. Since it was my birthday a few days ago my dh said to pick something out that I wanted and my first thought was...this!

Today my eldest decided to help me separate all the pieces into bags and I will tell you that it took us about 2 hours to get this task completed. We had a great time laughing and figuring it all out. I was so thankful for her help!

I had also decided to start to make the rosette wreath that I have been seeing all over the internet. I went looking for paper and I found my old childhood book that had lots of pages missing. I thought it might be fun to use it so I have just gotten started. All I can say is the paper is very brittle and this is going to be time consuming but then...who cares!!! It is started! Blessings to each of you..we are now on day 30!!

The last of Halloween...day 29

2011-10-29T18:21:00.000-04:00

Tonight it Trick or Treat so Happy Halloween! Tomorrow Thanksgiving Begins!

Not Another Deer!

2011-10-28T18:32:00.000-04:00

Not another deer!!!You have got to be kidding. A deer ran into the side of my daughters car...but she is not hurt. She was astounded how the deer seemed to come from nowhere but she put her things into another car and took off for work...lol Oh my!

This is my next project. I am going to start working on this advent calendar...I am nervous and I wish I was doing it with someone but I am going to try to start it this weekend. I will give you more detail then...It is amazing.
It has been a rough day and I have decided not to share all the bad...things that made me cry today but what I will share is that my daughter is not injured...the things that were broken can get fixed and I am headed to worship practice so my day should end on a good note. blessings.

Moving the Furniture Around..again. Day 27

2011-10-27T13:54:00.000-04:00

Well, the new furniture is starting to make an impact on our home. I have been wanting to get a new tv cabinet for quite some time but there was always something I didn't like about the new cabinets and I think the word I would say is that they lacked character. When I saw this stand on Craig's list I looked at if for a few days before I decided to go take a look. My dd helped me move all the equipment so that we did not have to unplug all those wires.

I think I am loving the stand now. The decorations help, don't you think? This is what it looked like before I decided to spruce it up.

This is when we first carried it into our home...I think it is wonderful. I am starting to look at paint chips for this room. I have a couple chosen but before I decide I have to make a decision about which furniture I am going to keep in this room and the room beside it.
I also have to decide which dining room sets I am moving into our dining room and which I am moving to other areas of our home....have some more thinking to do. This is day 27 of Days of Whimsy and I have almost made through the most of daily posting. I think I am going to miss it.

One amazing Tree

2011-10-26T23:51:00.000-04:00

This is the tree in our front yard. I took this picture 2 days ago. I was going to put something in the mailbox and when I saw the tree I want back in to get the camera. The shadow you see is actually the house. It is really beautiful this year. As you can see the tree right beside it has already lost it's leaves.
There has been so much rain this fall that I was not sure we were going to get to enjoy it but I am amazed and the color of the leaves....Thanks for visiting!

My new beautiful Furniture Finds!! Day 25

2011-10-25T22:07:00.000-04:00

Well Girls, the furniture has been unloaded into my shed for safe-keeping! I am still in love with it!! It is more beautiful than the pictures show. All the pieces have been painted and refinished so all the work has been done for me!

This little lady has the most beautiful legs!!

And her seat is nice too!!

Doesn't it look like you just want to take a seat and be so comfortable!!

The other lady is beautiful too. I will be looking for some chairs to go with her.

She has great legs too!

I know this is difficult to see but this is the stand for my tv. I will be moving all the tv things to this little beauty. I think she is just the best thing to go in an eclectic home and you know I am moving that way..right?

I think most anyone would love to have this stand! You could use it as a table too!

I am so excited to have found some pieces that I love and I found a new friend in the process. Thank you Laurie!

Day 24 New Furniture

2011-10-24T21:20:00.000-04:00

I am so excited...new furniture...More tomorrow!

Small addition to my room

2011-10-23T20:48:00.000-04:00

This is the small addition I added to my room make-over. It is a paper weight with a glam bird on it. The picture is not so good but I think you can kinda see it. I have not been working on much. I have so many ideas but so far not the energy to do them. I am being inspired by so many of your blogs so keep crafting!!!
I hope I have something more inspiring tomorrow!

A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle

Blessings to each of you.

A new Purchase for Day 22

2011-10-22T14:28:00.000-04:00

The store where i work had these delightful bowl on sale and for I thought that for Thanksgiving they would be a wonderful addition to our table. The spreaders came in a package of four so who could resist getting them as well. I am spending the day nesting. Cleaning, fluffing and quietly working on a few projects. Sometime quiet is so nice.

I placed the napkins in a large bowl for easy access. They go well with my little pumpkin candles.

Here is another finish I forgot to show you two days I love this snowman and I will be framing him maybe even today. I am going to go and try to find some frames for a reasonable price!
I have so much nesting that I love to do. I have throws and slippers and new decorations for the season. I also have another craft that I am working on so stay with me and see if it is something you want to try! Day 22 is officially blogged...but my day is just beginning. Off to the store for supplies...so excited.

Rambling

2011-10-21T23:18:00.000-04:00

Day 21 has been so busy. I started the day off with a trip to my daughter's school so she could put some long layers in my hair. Once that was complete I drove to Hobby Lobby to see about getting something framed. It was a difficult decision when choosing the frame and mat. Some of you might remember that I was stitching a piece for my Mom while she was sick. She did get to see it before she took a turn for the worse and she loved it. I had stitched it in her honor. If you don't remember then I will have it back in about 2 weeks and I will share a picture then.
It has been such a difficult week for me. I have had a hard time shaking the gloom off my days. I will have a thought about Mom and then I can't stop the tears. I am exhausted from the stress of it and yet I know that for now this is just the way things are.
I spent the evening with my eldest daughter at her apartment watching tv and ordering pizza. We talked and laughed and had a great time together...such a nice break in my week.
We have a renter rehab going on and that will consume some of my time next week and that might be okay too.
Isn't it so amazing how quickly things can change in our lives. How truth becomes clouded by those who can't or won't listen. But the truth doesn't change just because there is no listening...truth is truth...period. I stand on who I am and what I have done because in the end I have done the best that I can...no one can ask for more than that. Lord, help us.

More finishes for day 20

2011-10-20T14:30:00.000-04:00

Today I thought I would try to get some organizing done before the weekend and somehow I started going through some of my cross stitch bags. I am going to Hobby Lobby tomorrow to have something framed and for some reason I started rummaging through my bags like a crazy person. These are just a few of the ones that I found completed and ready to be framed. This set is Twas the Night Before Christmas.

I had not be cross stitching very long when my sisters and I each decided to stitch a set and then trade some so we would have each others work. Well. I don't know if they ever finished but these are the ones I did and they will be hanging this year for the first time. I have had them done for years.

Sometimes when you stuff things in a bag you forget that you have them done and they get mixed in with other things and before long, well...not this year.The stockings have my girls names on them.

I am sure if I look them over closely I will find things that I would change but they are finished and I am not working on them anymore. I hope that some day one of my children will want them in their home.

The I found so many more this is another finished piece.

And one I should have up right now.

And another for the next holiday. Sorry for the wrinkles but remember they were in a bag.

I even found some punch needle that I had finished a while back. I had just started to teach my Mom to punch needle before she got sick.

I actually had more to show you that were in the bag but there are so many I will wait for another day.
Do you believe we are on day 20....? Amazing. So what are you working on?

Day 19 Redecorating a lttle

2011-10-19T15:38:00.000-04:00

I have been doing a little rearranging and so far I am pretty happy with the results but the only problem I seem to be having is that I have more "stuff" and no place to sit it...lol These two little items have been displaced and I have been searching for somewhere else for them to go. The white drawers usually hang on the wall. If you look you will see some subway art on the wall...ya..that is where it usually hangs. The little urn is a new purchase from the clearance racks so it has never had a home. I think they both can go into the other living room but until after the holidays there is no space for them. Right now they are sitting on top of our radiator and that is fine until we turn the furnace on then it will be to warm for them there...I think!

I also wanted to share a picture of my new necklace. I purchased it at the French Hen Barn sale. It did not come with a chain so I bought a long piece of suede and made one myself. I love it. I didn't have any kids home today to model it for me so the urn had to stand in for them!
I am planning on meeting my daughter for dinner tonight so I do hope all the rain stops but if not I guess she is worth the drive. I miss her..Hope your day is free of tear drops.

Day 18 Yesteryear

2011-10-18T22:22:00.000-04:00

How could my babies be so grown up??? This is a picture from yesteryear. The babies are now 23, 19 and 18. How could that be? I miss having little ones in our home. But I know there will be a day when our family will increase and the babies will come but until then I will enjoy them just as they are now. Remembering them is such sweet memories...love you girls!

Day 17 Giving Thanks

2011-10-17T23:34:00.000-04:00

Feeling sad. Feeling like it is so much work to figure out what happens next. I know that losing my Mother has been life-changing for me and my children. What I don't know is how to start to move forward. This weekend was sobering and this set of holidays will be another reminder of what I don't have any longer. I know that I must find things to be thankful for and that I have been doing...praising even in the pain.
I know that worship isn't based on just feeling good...you have to worship no matter what is happening in your life. So I am thankful that I had my Mother for so long. I am thankful that she was loving and kind and supportive. I am thankful for all the things she gave me...her time and her talents...her love and encouragement. I know that she has now passed the torch to me but the burden is just so heavy...so I will honor her in the ways that I can and I will pray for what is to come.
Tomorrow I will be posting something a little more light-hearted! Thanks for being there for me!

day 16 is quiet

2011-10-16T18:22:00.000-04:00

Today, I am quiet. I am still. I am choosing to rest and try to curb this roller coaster of emotions that I have been having for the last few days. Today...I am quiet.

Day 15 The Most Beautiful Girl In The World..

2011-10-15T17:29:00.000-04:00

Our youngest, Homecoming 2011...the late one.

Day 14...I am boring today!

2011-10-14T20:37:00.000-04:00

    I am sorry dear friends but no pictures today. I spent the day visiting little shops and enjoying the wonderful weather. Tomorrow is my birthday and I spent the day with some special people. We spent it laughing and chatting and enjoying a light lunch.
There were pumpkins and decorations everywhere and then my eyes started to spy the most beautiful Christmas decorations I have ever seen...I was happy and sad to see them...ya know...I just can not face Christmas just yet. I am not ready for Holiday Cheer. I will get there but I am not there just yet. So for tomorrow I am going to spend the day with our youngest daughter who is celebrating her last homecoming. She has the day planned out. Getting her hair done at 10 am...and the lunch with me before her friends come over for pictures and laughs...it will be bittersweet.
   We will be busy and I will pretend that I don't notice that Mom is gone...I will spend the day with my children and dh and that will be fine.
   I did pick up a little treasure for myself and I will share a picture tomorrow. For tonight I am going to put my feet up and relax...and wait for hubby to get home.

Grief...

2011-10-13T17:07:00.000-04:00

I am going to be more honest than you probably want me to be. Yesterday, after I posted a picture about my redecorating I had a meltdown. It was my own fault. They say waves of grief come at unexpected times and yesterday that is what happened.
I had most everything done when I realized that I wanted to move one of the paintings that my Mom had painted for me. I took it off the nail and when I turned around her signature was right at eye level. And that is all it took. It was like a thief in the night, the realization that Mom is gone in a way that seems like forever. The panic of my heart, the tears the sobbing. A meltdown.
Our youngest daughter was right there in the room and she just started trying to comfort me. I just needed to cry and so I did. I has been such a long 7 weeks without her. How many times I have picked up the phone to call her where something funny has turned sad...a very long 7 weeks. When a waive of grief attacks you it is almost unbearable. Mom has always been my best friend and without her I have become lost. I continue to move and do but my heart is burdened with pain.
Now I don't want you to get me wrong. This has nothing to do with faith. I have powerful Lord who is loving and kind and will continue to support me and encourage me. No, I am talking about the selfish part of me who wasn't ready, would never be ready to give her up. The child in me who looks for my Mom because she was always there and always the first to encourage. She was unconditional love and all the things I now strive to be. Yesterday was not a good day. Today my body is tired and I feel alone but I will continue to do what I need to do. To be a Mom who is getting her daughter ready of homecoming...to be a Mom to another who is struggling to find her place in the college world and to be the Mom my daughter needs as she starts her first job in her career and faces a possible move. I will do all these things because that is what Mom would have wanted, that is what she taught me to do. I know that this wave of grief will subside but for today...it is overwhelming.

Whimsical day 12...Redecorating!

2011-10-12T20:44:00.000-04:00

Well today was so dreary and rainy that I decided to brighten things up by rearranging the furniture and putting up some of my new decorations. Now the shelf was already there and I think I am going to paint it white but for today I decided to just decorate.

Sorry the pictures are so dark but I just could not get them to come out better. This room is on the north side of our home so not much light today. I will be painting this room within the next week!

This is what was on the shelf when I started..more country with a wool wall hanging. I love those birds but for now I will try to find a new spot for them.

I found a spot for my white pumpkin in this room too!

Here is a little sneak peak of what I am working on but just when I was getting so inspired my dh came home and said some of our renters had moved out without a notice which means I will be spending the next week painting and working there so this project is now on hold...I will show you more when I get back to it.
Hope all is well with you!

Fall Mantle for day 11

2011-10-11T09:17:00.000-04:00

The great thing about writing about the 31 days of Whimsy is that it really doesn't matter what I am writing about...it is freeing! I did switch out my mantle a while back. This is the fall version and below is the summer version. I love to make the wool wall hangings and I am not sure how they will fit into a new vintage decorating scheme but I want them to stay so I will have to make it work.

I would love to do a make over on my fire place but I don't think this is the time to be making any decisions that I might now be able to live with later...ssssooooo. Sometimes in the midst of grief you do things you would not normally do but I think I could live with stripping the wall paper off my foyer and I am thinking about seriously just doing it!!
Sometimes when hubby comes home he just stands and looks at what I have started and shakes his head. You would think he would be use to it by now!
I am off to work now but I will be around to visit you later this evening! We are having such beautiful weather I wish I could enjoy it! Have a blessed day.

Day 10 Loving the Change!

2011-10-10T09:14:00.000-04:00

As some of you know, I have been talking about changing my decorating style. I have been decorating with wool wall hangings and I would call it a mix of country and primitive. I have decided that I am going to go for a more shabby chic/cottage style. That being said. It is a hard transition since that means most of my stuff has to go!
When you look back at my kitchen mini make-over you can see the style is changing. So when we went to the French Hen Farm sale and I saw this tea set I fell in love with it. I knew that I had the perfect spot for it on my built in china cabinet. Isn't she the most beautiful thing. This is my birthday present from my sister. She had been looking for something to get me and when I said I loved it she said she was getting it for me.
I am over-joyed I really am..what a blessing this present was to me! As I start to make the decorating change this will be ever-present in my home. My Mom would have loved this piece!

Whimsical Chenille Pumpkin!

2011-10-09T18:44:00.000-04:00

Well Bloggers, We are now on day 9 of the 31 days and it is going so fast! I have been saving this post for a few days but I hope you give it a try. I had been thinking about making one of these chenille pumpkins for a while and I guess the other day while I was at walmart I decided to look for the supplies. It really is pretty cool but I am not sure if you can tell that by the pictures!

This is not where i am going to place it but I thought you could see it better in the pictures.

The supplies are a $5 pumpkin from Walmart, Tacky glue $.99 and Bernat Baby Blanket $2.50/ You could use yarn that you have on had also...wouldn't lime green be sweet?

Well, this picture didn't help at all.

There we go. I just put glue on the pumpkin in small sections and then I would twirl it into a circle. Once it was the size I wanted I pushed in together to squish it a little bit.

This is what it looks like up close and personal...it is so soft. The next time I may coffee stain the yarn first and then make the pumpkin but I am not going to do that on this one. It took about half of the yarn for this project. If you try it send me a message so I can see how yours turned out...

Fall on the Front Porch!

2011-10-08T19:39:00.000-04:00

It has been so beautiful that I decided it was time to fix up the front porch for the fall season. This is a pretty simple display but I think for this year it is enough!

The pumpkins were from our garden. We did not have as many pumpkins this year. It got a little late before we got things planted this year. With Mom being sick it just did not seem very important. I know she would have wanted me to go ahead and decorate even when I am not feeling like it. This display will stay until the day after Thanksgiving!
I hope you had an enjoyable day. The weather was so perfect. I did finish a little craft that I will share tomorrow. It is a vintage pumpkin look-alike.

Barn Sale for Day 7

2011-10-07T20:32:00.000-04:00

What a great day we had today. I spent the morning at French Hen Farm. If you haven't been to there barn sale then you are really missing out on so much great stuff! Almost all of the furniture was sold before we entered the door of the barn. That might have been a good thing since I could have purchased so many of their pieces!

Are these framed clover such a clever idea?? They did a nice job of displaying these pictures.

This was in the bathroom...sorry but I thought it was so cute in there!

I had seen this table and chairs on the blog but it was sold before I got there...I really loved the color of paint on this piece!

This dresser was not sold and I wanted to bring it home with me but I just could not find a place in my home right now but by spring I will have made a space for some new stuff!!!

This was one of the outside displays!

There was so much to see and to think about. I was happy that most of the crowd had left by the time we got there. I did get a but necklace and a great birthday present which I will show you tomorrow. We did have a light lunch at a little shop close by but I didn't get pictures. But I do think I will be back there next week and then I will share that shop too.
If you are not too far away from Marysville, French Hen Farm Barn sale is tomorrow from 9-5. It is worth the drive...the ladies told me that tomorrow they are have all new furniture to display...I missed it! French Hen Farm is on my blog list if you want to see more pictures!!! Another day of whimsy!!

Fall Decorating...outside

2011-10-06T13:28:00.000-04:00

What a beautiful day we are having here in Ohio and I decided to take advantage of it and mow the grass!! When I finished that I thought I would put out a few decorations for fall on the porch and around the property!

From the sidewalk you can see our cinderella pumpkins.

When parking you can see this little collection of pumpkins!

At the back door.

This is my harvest of sweet annie. I am going to use it as a display in front of my shed!
Now, I seem to be showing a lot of pumpkins but then I am just showing you what I am up to...I have started the front porch...more to come on that topic.
I am enjoying reading all of your post!

Five days of Whimsy...

2011-10-05T21:51:00.000-04:00

Well what a day it has been. I had the day planned. First I was going to decorate the Operation Christmas Child table at the church....done. Next, make a few appointments for Friday..done...Then I remembered that my daughter was having trouble with her Mac so I called that is where is story takes a turn. You see I was going to decorate my front porch today and show you the pictures and I was going to mow the yard and gather the pumpkins. After that I was going to rearrange the furniture in our living room.
   One phone call changed my plan. Apple wanted me to take the computers today to get them fixed..ok but that is an hours' drive from my home. So I stopped at Walmart to pick up a few items and I ran into the a friend who said she would ride with me...whooo hooo what great luck that was.
   So we fought the traffic and got there 7 minutes late for my appointment (the appointments are 15 min. apart so that means I already had used half of my time.) Once the computers were fixed we decided to checked out some of the other shops. I dropped my friend off and headed home when I remembered that I needed to stop at Lowes and look at carpeting for our rental...oh my. After looking at the carpeting and waiting for a clerk I finally got an estimate for $800. Not bad but I was tired and I still had to check out what dh was doing.
   So the yard needs to be mowed, the porch is naked. The pumpkins are still in the pumpkin patch and tomorrow I get to try again. Today was a wonderful day and an example of how sometimes you just have to do the first thing first.
   It was a beautiful day for a drive and I took advantage of it...I drove for hours. Tomorrow I will start new and fresh and ready to get a few things done...I have wall paper to strip...yes tomorrow I will start again and see where that leads me. Whimsical day completed.

Yet another pumpkin!

2011-10-04T09:26:00.000-04:00

How about another pumpkin that is quick and easy??? No, not the one on the left the ones on the right.
I found a round plate for the larger ones and traced in onto a scrap piece of material. With wrongs sides together sew it just leaving a small section open to turn and stuff. Next hand sew it shut.
Now thread some dmc floss that is similar to the color of your pumpkin and start at the bottom of the pumpkin and pull your needle all the way through the top of the pumpkin. draw it so in pulls the material in .now pull thread around to the bottom and come back up through the center of the pumpkin. Each time move the thread around the pumpkin so it creates the veins. When you have enough sections to suit you tie it off on the top of the pumpkin. I went outside and picked up a few sticks and hot glued them into the center which covered up the knot. I am so sorry that I do not have pictures of the process but you get the idea. I did coffee stain mine to make them look old.

Another bowl with the sweater pumpkins on my back porch!
Both are so easy!!! If you make one send me a picture!!!
Just so you know, my daughter glued the crown on the above pumpkin so she would know which one was hers!! She is a gem! Now how is that for whimsy?

Days of Whimsy!

2011-10-03T00:46:00.000-04:00

My Treasures! Oh Lord Thank You for all you have given me!
(p.s. That is me in the second picture in the middle with my Mother and daughter)

Whimsical Pumpkin Man

2011-10-02T08:41:00.000-04:00

Oh my word, I think he is so cute and there was no sewing to this project. If you think you can't do this...just ask yourself, "Can I use scissors and a glue gun?" If you can then this project is for you.
My Mother and I made this guy in 2009 and he looks just the same today as he did when we made him. I lay him flat to store him...he does not come apart.

This is where I go the pattern. I adored the material they used and I hunted to find something similar. He is made by cutting out backer- board into the pattern shapes and then cutting the material from the pattern and then let the hot gluing begin. I am so sorry to say that for some reason Mom and I did not take pictures of the process.
The most difficult part of the project was making his arms move but honestly that was no big deal either just a couple brads and that was it!
He now hangs on my inside porch door. The picture above is actually facing into our foyer!
The good thing about 31 days of whimsy is that my posts can random...so there you have it!
I have enjoyed visiting all of you and will be around again today to see what you are up to! Blessings.

First Day...Whimsical Sweater Pumpkins!

2011-10-01T11:41:00.000-04:00

It is October 1st and the 31 Days of Whimsy are here. I am so excited to be focused on something different and new well...kinda new. The sweater pumpkins have been such a big success that I wanted to share them before we get too late into the season . This is my bowl of pumpkins that sit new the entrance to my kitchen door for all too see. But rest assured there are more throughout my home too!

They are so easy to make and fun to decorate with...here is how they are made.

I took a sweater from the Goodwill and cut off the sleeve. You will need a ball of twine or rope or yarn..just something to tie it with. You will need to turn the sweater sleeve inside out to start.

Now cut the rope so that it sticks out on both ends and you have enough to tie up the pumpkins on each side. You will need to tie the small end of the sweater with a piece of rope so the ends don't pull through. Then when you turn the sleeve inside out (now the sweater is the right direction) the ends will be on the inside of the pumpkin.

Stuff the inside of the pumpkin with stuffing and at this point you are ready to bring the rope up on each side of the pumpkin just leaving a gap between strands. When you have rope all the way around the pumpkin so it looks like veins then you are ready to tie the top shut with yet another piece of rope.

Now at this point you can stop or.....

You can wind the top around the rest of the sweater. I like mine to be WHIMSICAL!!!! There are other places one web you can find tutorials on these also and if you look back at my original blog I did not where I found the tutorial that I used too.I believe it was Deb Kennedy at
http://hummadeedledee.blogspot.com/2008/09/pumpkin-inspiration-tutorial.html. Have a great time!

31 Days of Whimsy

2011-09-29T13:09:00.000-04:00

I am joining the fun for the 31 Days of Whimsy! Well, it is really 31 days of ??? Mine is whimsy. I found information about it at http://www.thenester.com/ I am excited to see what all the ladies will be writing about. I have been working on a few things very slowly but I will share in the next 31 days! I do want to think Michele http://www.thegreatread.blogspot.com/ for making my great button. She did a wonderful job and I think she must be pretty generous to volunteer to make it for me!!! It is wonderful.

You might be asking why whimsy? Well, mainly because I could not settle on one topic so I am going to just begin and ramble on...so look out!
I would again like to thank all of you for your kind words and support..and prayers. Please continue to remember me in your prayers because I have so many really weepy days. I am lonely without her but I am trying to keep going, ever so slowly but I am here. Hope you join in the fun...Blessings to you.

Today is a new start?

2011-09-14T10:48:00.000-04:00

Today doesn't feel like a new day, but today I am trying to make some positive changes. Now don't get me wrong, I am still crying over just about everything, I still want to sit on the sofa and not move. I am not motivated to do much of anything. But....
A few things have changed. I am now forcing myself to walk at least 1 1/2 miles each day. I love to walk and even though I do not feel like walking I have started. I have started to decorated for the fall season and through many tears of sadness and joy I am rediscovering all the crafts my Mother gave me or made for me. I am back to working 2 days a week. I am trying to do the things that were normal before Mom got sick..these are the things that used to be normal.
The other thing I am going to do is to try to put this blog back on track...a blog of decorating and family...just for fun...ya know what I mean?
Now, I know Mom would want me to be happy and I can't be happy unless I share things about her too because when you have a broken heart that is all you really want to talk about. That being the case, I am going to share my memories and thoughts and tears on my other blog. I can not pretend that things are fine but I can separated my blogs so that you can read where you feel comfortable. Don't get me wrong, you will be hearing about Mom sometimes but my tears and my memories will be sent to my other blog at least for now. Do I think this will make me feel better??? I don't know because right now nothing feels better and nothing looks or feels normal so I am forging ahead trying to find that new path I told you about.
So I will put my camera in my hand and take a few pictures. If I think of something creative, I will share it..for today this is about as creative as it gets, so don't get too excited! For today, well this is the best I can do. But this is a whole lot better than it has been....miss you Mom. Be blessed.

Remembering. With Love

2011-09-09T20:53:00.000-04:00

I am trying to settle into a new type of normal. I no longer go to my Mothers' home everyday, she is in her Heavenly home, I am spending more time in my own home. After reading so many of your wonderful words of wisdom, I have decided to do at least a little fall decorating. So, I went to the basement and opened the first container and the tears started to roll. I found so many items that Mom had made or we made together. There are many things that she purchased for me and the sweater pumpkins that we made last year...Oh so many happy memories that made me cry even more. But it is better to have the tears as I remember than to let all the items be packed away for another year.
After crying through the first tub...I will save the other two for tomorrow but for today I am happy for all the great memories of the love she so freely passed to me and my family...that will linger a lifetime.
I will post a few pictures when I get started and after the tears I am hoping for a few warm smiles...good night dear friends.

2011-09-04T22:32:00.000-04:00

Well today I thought about putting out a few autumn decorations, I have seen some of the most amazing decorations in blog land. I am just not sure how I feel about decorating when we are in the midst of grief. I feel like it is so pointless but then I remember that Mom made so many of the decorations and she often bought some of them for me too. So now I have to decide if I am honoring her by decorating or honoring her by not decorating. I am so exhausted and yet I have no motivation. I think I will consider it for tomorrow..or maybe I won't...Oh how I miss my Mother.
Thank you all for sticking with me though this terrible time. I am trying to find some inspiration..so stay with me a little longer. Blessings to you.

Trying to find a new path

2011-09-01T23:50:00.000-04:00

Well, here I am. I miss my Mother. She is gone and my world is forever changed. It is now time for me to step up and be the same kind of mom that she was to me! I will find the strength to move very slowly through the pain and begin to find my path.
At some point we will find a new normal but for now we are trying to carve a new path without the one who held us together. I will honor her memory by honoring her wishes. And for today I will just try to find the energy, the strength and the will to more forward. I am holding on to the hand of God...and for today that is enough.

My Mother Entered the Gates of Heaven

2011-08-24T16:41:00.000-04:00

My Mom is forever in my heart. Carol Y Walter.

Just here for a short minute

2011-08-12T20:59:00.000-04:00

Hello Dear Friends,
   I am sitting here with Mother today. It is just her and I and it is peaceful here. Most days there are so many people in and out and so much noise. But today the doors are open, the ac is off and we are listening to crickets and birds and all sorts of nature noises...it is wonderful.
   But today Mother is too quiet. She has been sleeping for too many hours and days. She is so tired, so exhausted that I now only get moments of time with her. She is still the most courageous person I know. She is with us now for such a short time, her body is so small but her smile still so bright. Oh how my heart hurts, how I want to remember all the time we have spent together. I have so many wonderful memories of our times with my children, shopping, crafting and gardening.
   Mother is my biggest champion, always encouraging at just the right time. I don't think there was a time that she thought I couldn't do something..she would just be confident that I could and...I needed to get started. My Mother has spent countless hours in her garden and mine....Oh I want to remember every moment. But for now I am trying to enjoy just being here with her. She would do the same for me.
     I am sitting here beside her as she sleeps and dreams of heaven. I know she is ready, I know that the Lord will be taking her from me and I am not sure how I will survive but I know she has confidence in me and I have so much love for her that I will be brave enough to let her make her way to Heaven when the time is right.

struggling....

2011-08-02T11:20:00.000-04:00

Today dear friends, I am struggling. Some days I think I live in a world of wishes. I see Mom and we talk and I think she is better and I decide to forget that she has a terminal illness. Some days I try to ignore the signs of her illness. Some days I even talk to her about when she is better...all the projects we have to work on...And some days it strikes my heart that she is fading away.
My life is about to take a terrible turn and I know I am not ready. I know I will never be ready. My Mom is the one person that has always accepted me just the way I am. She knows my flaws, she knows my heart and she loves me for me. She is my cheerleader my adviser and my friend. My world is better with her here. I am suffering.
I had someone tell me that this is the circle of life. Of course I my mind knows that but my heart doesn't understand or accept what is coming. I know that God will give me the strength when I need it but for today I struggle.
I want to be as strong as she is, I want to be as generous as she is and I want love my kids unconditionally just as she does. Her legacy will be that she devoted her life to being a wife and a mother. We are the legacy of her life. We are the ones she devoted her time and talents to, her love and delight.
Today, I am struggling.

A Cool Summer Lunch and another update

2011-07-31T21:51:00.000-04:00

I made a simple cold lunch last week and I thought I would share a few pictures. It has been so hot here and I didn't want to start up the stove or the oven so this is what I came up with. Seafood salad and chicken salad sandwiches..

Broccoli salad and fresh veggies, cheese cubes and a salad.

I did have a few chips and yogurt covered raisins and then I made a yogurt/pound cake dessert with cool whip and strawberries. Everything was simple and easy and cold. I forgot to take a picture of the punch but it was raspberry lemonade with lemon lime soda. What a fun way to make a cold meal but it was enough to satisfy a person who was really hungry! We had a nice time at lunch!
And for all of you who are prayer for us I would like to thank you for our kindness. I am sure that my Mother remains pain free because you have joined us in prayer! I spent the day with her today and she says she is thankful for each and every prayer. Mom was very quiet and tired today. Tonight we have called the nurse in because for some reason my Moms face has become swollen. Please continue to pray for all of us!

What a difference a Week has Made

2011-07-24T08:07:00.000-04:00

Hello Dear Friends, What a difference a week makes. Last week Mom was doing so poorly that we called in Hospice for help. Hospice has switched some of her medications and it seems to have made a big difference, So today, well will you believe Mom felt so good that my sister too her to a salon and got a perm and color? lol now that is an improvement!

What a journey we are on. So stressful and so emotional but yet filled with blessings. I know that so many of you are sending prayers for our family and I wanted to tell you that I am truly touched by your kindness and thoughtfulness. I can not express how much you have all touched my life with your prayers. I know that our journey will continue to take many turns but I know that God has a purpose beyond our understanding. Again, I am blessed by each of you.

Sad

2011-07-16T09:30:00.000-04:00

Yesterday we had to have Hospice come in for Mother. Yesterday was not a good day.

Progress on Tis the Season

2011-07-11T10:55:00.000-04:00

I have been working on my Tis the Season and those little holly leaves are coming along. I did have to do some frogging since one of them I stitched in the wrong colors!
My dh and I went for a drive yesterday just to have a little time together. We drove for six hours and had an enjoyable time stopping here and there. But today we are back into our routine.
It is so hot here that I can not even spend time in my garden, the humidity is so very high. I will spend part of the day catching up on errands and laundry!
My dear Mother had a wonderful day yesterday and it was quite nice to hear her say she is so board just sitting in her chair all day. She tires easily but she was not weak and shaky and that is just a great thing.
My youngest is at camp this week so our home is quiet and I am determined to get a few projects started, well, if I have the energy for them!
I will post more tomorrow but for today please continue your prayers for my Mother! Blessings to you.

A Blessing and a Dead Deer!

2011-07-09T13:46:00.000-04:00

Dear Friends, We have once again been so blessed. Our never-ending saga continues. Well, maybe I should just say that when you have 3 girls driving it seems there is always something. Our middle daughter was coming home from work and a deer jumped over a guard rail and right into the path of her car. She was going to fast to stop and the car took a major hit.

The poor deer didn't make it but thank the Lord our daughter was safe and not hurt.
Here in Ohio when the farmers take the wheat off the deer begin running, I mean thousands of deer start running everywhere. The accidents are daily but this is a first for us.
So we are waiting to see what the insurance people say but in the mean time we are without a much needed car. We will just have to make due somehow!
I am still stitching on Tis the Season and it is looking much better. My Mother is enjoying the progress too. She has been having some good days and we are so blessed by that. Thank you for your prayers and kind thoughts. I will be back soon with some new pictures!

The 4th of July

2011-07-04T15:12:00.000-04:00

Hope you are having a wonderful day. What a joy to live in a free country. Let's make sure our children know the true story of our Nation!
Please remember to pray for my Mother, she is not having a good day. Blessings to each of you.

Stitching update...and a new find

2011-07-02T14:17:00.000-04:00

I pray you are having an enjoyable day. We are having fireworks tonight i our little town. I love the fireworks but it makes me sad that we don't watch them together as a family like we did when the girls were small. We would go early and the girls would play and eat snacks before the fireworks began, those were fun days!

Wanted to share the progress I have made. i do like the poison apple a little better but if I stitch this pattern again I may just change this color. I do hope Mom loves it!

Look what I found...Oh I adore them. This is just the beginning of my make over for my living room and dining room. i am not painting yet...no just collecting item as I see them. These beauties were 80% off at Hobby Lobby so there were very reasonable...I mean cheap!
Mom was looking well yesterday and was in very good humor. She is such a treasure. We had a project we were going to work on before she got sick so this week I am going to take all the stuff to her home and make it with her watching if she doesn't feel like helping. I know she will enjoy it if she is having a good day. I will be sure to share the pictures when I get it done!. Blessings be with you.

Season of Change

2011-06-29T20:46:00.000-04:00

Hello Dear Friends,
I am feeling contrary today. I am feeling tired and,ummmm, not sure what the word is, maybe reflective. Today our youngest left for a road trip with her dear friend and well, I am happy for her. I am happy that we have taught her to be independent and a free spirit. I am sad that she is spreading her wings and flying further away. Let's face it, we raise them to be responsible and then we are sad when it is time for the to use the tools that they have to just live life.
So many changes are upon me. This has been my last year of home schooling my children. They have each graduated now and that season of our lives is over. I was ready for it to be over, ready to move on but still sad and well reflecting back on all the things I will miss about having our children so near!
Then of course there have been such big changes with my Mother since March.
She always spent hours working in her gardens and helping each of us.
She helped because it was her delight to do so. She was always the first one to volunteer to help and willing to do any job there was. My Mother is not a complainer, she still does not complain. Now, would other people say that about me? No, I don't think they would. She is so sick and now needs someone to take care of her. She often doesn't feel well but she doesn't complain and she is always so grateful. Again, my life has changed because of her in so many ways. I am watching her struggle and fight for good days...I see things that are slipping away. I know that none of our lives will be the same. A new season, a very different season.
I have known that there was a new season coming and I have been worried about it. Worried that I make good choices about what I am to do. I do not have the answers yet but I am waiting and listening to see what God has planned for me. Sometimes the waiting is the difficult part...but really it is the listening...to that still small whisper...from the one who already knows all answers.

Summer Fun!

2011-06-27T13:54:00.000-04:00

Dear Friends, I can't tell you how great it was to spend a weekend having some summer fun with my family!
My dh and our youngest are just finishing up their summer of softball games and they finished in glory!
Our team finished first in the league and first in tourneys, now that is the way it should be! Saturday was the championship game and since we had not lost all we had to do was beat the other team once and we would be the champs, so with a 14-7 win, it was all over!

My sweet daughter and my handsome hubby, the coach for the last 11 years!

Teammates and close friends since they were 8 years old!

Our daughter plays first base and this is the pitcher from the team that came in 2nd. They are such good friends and spend their time joking around together and today was not different! We call her our daughter!

We had a day filled with games and a picnic, beautiful weather and laughs. The only tears for the day was when my hubby told the girls that this was his last year of coaching. He cried, they cried, the parents cried too! Bittersweet!

On another note, I visited my Mom today at her home and she was all smiles and having a great day! She was having company and was done with her bath. We are trying a new doctor and she is now taking even more vitamins and drinking lots of water. Of course other things too but we are so blessed because today she was not on any pain medication...not even Advil....PTL! What a great day she was having...and I was too!

So today I am home with my family, and there is much to do but first I am going to spend some time in prayer, then spend some time with my dh and then, well, maybe something creative for a change!
Blessing to each of you and please continue to pray for my Mother!

Tis the Season..start...

2011-06-21T17:09:00.000-04:00

No I am not talking about Christmas, I am starting Tis the Season, the Blackbird design in honor of my Mother. Each day as she sits in her chair she watches all the different birds that are on all the feeders we have outside the window. She so loves to see the birds come and go. Mostly, she loves cardinals and when I showed her this design she fell in love with it. So, yesterday I starting stitching in while I was sitting with her and she kept say, "Let me see what you have done now," so today I took it again and she just loves it. I have decided to stitch it when I am with her and we visit and pass the time away.
I was a little disappointed with the red, poison apple, but I am hoping that when it is finished that is appears more read than it does in person. I am not putting Tis the Season on it, I am replacing the lettering with my Mothers' name and birth year. I now she will be pleased.

Mom was having a good day today...we are getting our miracle daily, she remains pain free and alert! Thank you Jesus!

Another Update on my Mom...

2011-06-18T14:53:00.000-04:00

For those of you who are following the information on my Mother, I thought I would send a quick update on her condition.
My Mother is doing alternative treatments since there were no other options for us. Last Tuesday, she took a treatment and the rest of the day she was just exhausted. Then on Wednesday and Thursday she took a turn for the worse, she could not carry on a conversation or stay awake long enough to eat. I have been beyond scared and sad. I would say that I was crying but as some of you know I cry everyday...I guess I am the crier of the bunch and I did not know that about myself.
My sister and I spend the night with her on Thursday, fearing the worse...and Friday...Praise the Lord she was chipper again...weak...shaky but she was back to talking. Today, she is weak and shaky but she was eating and talking. She is even thinking about going to my sisters house tomorrow for a short drive. Now I don't know if that will happen but just the thought of her saying she wanted to go...well, I am so thrilled.
Now, don't get me wrong, I know what is to come...without divine healing, she will not be with us much longer...but I cherish each day....I am so happy we have been blessed with a little more time.
Tomorrow is Father's day...hug your dad as if there were not more days...because sometimes there aren't!

This is a tough journey and I know some of you have already been down this road but just a few thoughts. I know that sometimes friends don't ask about Mom because they know it makes me cry (which makes them uncomfortable) but tears don't mean I don't want to talk about it...they mean I am sad. I am sad whether you ask or not but I try to look normal through the pain....I try to...I do...
If you know someone going through the battle give them a hug and a prayer...that is what they will remember!

A Mini Make-Over

2011-06-16T08:39:00.000-04:00

Thank you all so much for your kind comments about my porch. I have spent some time there this year just for the quiet of it! I may let it remain this way until fall. I usually try to changes things up after the 4th of July but I think I am content with it for this year.
I did want to update you on Mom. The last few days she has not been feeling well, she is just exhausted and very pale. Not the normal chit chat just resting and sleeping. We are hoping she regains some of her strength since we are skipping her treatments today. Please continue your prayers for her to remain pain free.
On another note, I wanted to share just a few more pictures of happenings here...hope you are not getting bored with it but here it goes.

I had my dh take down the light in the kitchen, which was goldish, and I spray painted it a shiny white. It is so much better. The chains were just not working for me so I bought some beads at Hobby Lobby and fixed it up.

Now you can get a better idea of how it turned out.
I did start a new cross stitch and I will try to show you that tomorrow. I am short on time today as I head out to see Mom. Please continue your prayers!

2011-06-15T09:12:00.000-04:00

I wanted to show you a few pictures of my front porch today. i still do not have it painted (the floor needs a new coat of paint) but the decorating is done anyways...!

A quiet Walk Through the Garden!

2011-06-14T10:23:00.000-04:00

First, Dear Friend, I would like to thank you for sticking with me through this difficult time. Mom is still very weak but continues to be in very little pain and that is such a blessing! Thank you so much for your prayers!
I have not had any time for make-overs but I have a few more pictures of the gardens that I thought you might enjoy. We are still busy with softball games for one more week so...enjoy the pictures!

A walk down the sidewalk past the frog pond.

A new area to rest and rejuvenate.

A new addition to the garden.

Another new addition to the garden...he was just too cute!

A walk down the driveway!
Well, this is it for today but tomorrow I will show you the pictures of my front porch all decked out for summer. Again, we covet your prayers for our Mother.

2011-06-10T18:01:00.000-04:00

I am sorry that I have been away but our internet has been out for days. Today the repair man informed me that our trees need trimmed...really...lol. Ok, we will get right after that!
I spent most of my day today with Mother. I gave her a bath and then took her to see her family doctor. She was very exhausted when she finally got home. Mother was in a good mood but a little less talkative than usual. Some days she looks so sad but she continues to be the strongest person I know. She was able to attend our graduation party and we felt so blessed by that. So...let's move on to some pictures!

The Graduate and the Grandma!!!! We are proud of you Dyanna! Mother was not feeling well that day. She had just come from the funeral home, her brother pasted about a few days earlier.

We found my little great nieces playing with the dogs...too funny!

So many friends

So much food!

I think they were having a good time!

We had a day filled with so much fun and laughter. Just for the day we forgot about all the worries and trials we are facing. Just for the day our daughter was a shining star, the princess for a day. What a great relief for me that all went well and our family and friends were so close by.
So Congrats, my baby girl. May your life be filled with blessings!

Just For A Minute

2011-06-07T19:23:00.000-04:00

This sounds like a movie but we had a funeral, a birthday and a graduation party this last few days.
We have been so busy that it is overwhelming. Just wanted to say that Mom is holding her own and she was able to make it to the graduation party for a while and that was just enough to make my daughter just beam. I will update with pictures and all the info but for now keep us in your prayers!

One Week to go before the Party!

2011-05-29T15:12:00.000-04:00

Hello Dear Friends,
I am sorry to have been gone so long. I have been spending my time getting ready for our dd graduation party at our home and spending some time with Mom. First let me say again that we are so thankful for your prayers and kind words. Mom has been holding her own this week. She had a port put in so that the treatments would be easier for her. She is also thankful for your prayers.
So, on to what I have been doing....lol...a little of everything!

Our little frog pond is now clean and ready to go. I didn't have the waterfall on for the picture but it is up and running too so one major job is complete.

A few decorations have started to appear just outside the door.

The flowers are starting to praise the Lord daily!

The crock in the background is now planted too so now worries.
We have been attending graduation parties all weekend and with ours next weekend the work will continue this week. I do have to go to a doctors appointment with Mom on Tuesday and a double header softball game on Monday evening but the rest of the time I will be working on those last minute preparations.
I do hope all is going well with you and yours and I am sorry that I can not visit much this week but please know that I appreciate each of you! Blessings

Tired to the bone

2011-05-20T16:07:00.000-04:00

Dear Friends, this has been such a stressful time. When someone you love is so terribly sick it puts a stress on everyone. But when you have a dysfunctional family it is even more complicated. These are trying times and there is no road map so we make the best choices that we can...sometimes we don't all agree but we have find a way to do our best for Mom. Mom spends all day resting either in bed or in a recliner. Her leg continues to make it difficult to walk but she remains in good spirits and mainly pain free so we are so grateful.
Mom continues to lose 2 lbs a week. She is often weak since she isn't eating much at this time. They are giving her a medication to help. She continues to take alternative treatments but it is too soon to know if they are working, so we wait and hope and pray.
I am now down to two weeks before our youngest daughter graduates. There is so much to be done. So for the next 2 weeks I will be working in and around my home. I do hope to share a few pictures as I go along but for today I am just too tired to worry about it.
I do hope you continue to pray for our Mother and I will share once I get started working oh my own home. Blessings.

Just a little Update on Mother

2011-05-14T19:18:00.000-04:00

Sorry, no pictures today. I just am wresting with unrest. We are constantly making decisions that are life altering and yet without a road map we do not know if we are making good choices. Our road map has come in the form or the Lord opening and closing doors. This process has led us to where we are today.
Let me tell you dear friends, it is so stressful, so heartbreaking to watch your Mother as she fades away. She is losing 2 lbs a week and she is so weak. There are days when she rests most of the day in her chair watching the birds and looking at her flowerbeds.
Mother is still in good humor and enjoys visits from friends and family. I spend each day with her and I am enjoying her each moment. She still worries more about others than herself, just as she always has. These are such difficult times for all of us and yet we try to find the joy in each day. We laugh because we can still find something funny in the midst of tears. And we share tears often.
Please continue to share your prayers for us...we may be starting a new treatment this week and I know Mom has not decided if she really wants to try something else. We will try to follow her lead. Blessings to each of you.

We Were Blessed With a Wonderful Weekend!

2011-05-09T20:38:00.000-04:00

The smile of a new graduate. Our daughter...graduated from the University of Findlay, Sum ma Cum Laud.
Winner of the Outstanding Computer Science Student of the Year, graduating with over 800 other students...We love you and are so very proud!! What a great day we had.

Smiles from her dad too!

I was thrilled too! We had a wonderful day with our daughter and our family. Thank you all for being there to celebrate with us!

And much to our delight, my dear Mother felt well enough to attend. I know she was there by shire will but my daughter was so elated that my Mom could make it through the day!
And just when you thought that was all the excitement for the day...well not at our house. Our youngest had prom on the same day...of course so we rushed back to get to see her as she entered prom so...here she is..

Yes, this is our youngest and she had two dates in matching attire!

This one is the boy friend.

This one is a dear friend that needed someone to go with him because his gf is not old enough to attend!

And the girls just having a little fun!
So after a very difficult month of plenty of heartbreak we finally had something to smile about. We have been blessed this weekend. We have celebrated two important events but most of all we are blessed because my dear mother was with us smiling and laughing too. This week I heard my mother laugh out loud and it brought a happiness to my heart. We are so truly blessed. We had a wonderful Mother's Day! Until next time, be blessed.

Just a short update..

2011-05-03T15:21:00.000-04:00

Well, here we are. This is the week that we have been waiting for since my dd started college. This is graduation week. This is also the week that my Mother finished her radiation treatments and she is very exhausted. I have been having some difficult days. I will admit that even though I don't normally cry too often this has not been the case for the last month. I have days with my Mother when she is alert and content but there are days where she is exhausted.
I spent a few hours yesterday getting the last of the decorations for the graduation party. I have most everything purchased but dh and I went to see about getting him a few new things too. My dress still has not come for Saturday so I am holding my breath that it comes and that I like it!!! There has not been much time to shop so I ordered it over the Internet, I will let you know if this was such a great idea!
Tomorrow we are headed to Columbus to see about an alternative treatment for my Mother. We have exhausted all the conventional treatments so we are looking for a little hope in another way.
I would like to thank everyone for all your kind words but most of all your prayers. I know that we are having a miracle each and every day that my Mother is pain free. It is hard to believe that we have only known that she is sick since March 28th and that we are now told she has very little time. We continue to pray for miracles each and every day and we will not stop looking for help until she tells us to stop. Please remember us as we are traveling a difficult road and there is no road map for us to follow. I appreciate all of you more than you know.
We are so happy and proud of our daughter and when we graduates we will be sure to take lots of pictures to share with you.
May the Lord bless and keep you safe. Blessings until we meet again.

The highs and the lows

2011-04-27T21:16:00.000-04:00

Yesterday my daughter called me to say she had just picked up her cap and gown for graduation. She was so excited and I was just as excited for her. She is a good student and will be graduating with honors at the University. We giggled and laughed about all the things she is finishing in the last 10 days to prepare for graduation day. I think I am enjoying this celebration even more because I missed my college graduation...4 years of hard work and I was so sick for about 6 weeks and I was unable to walk...I just received my diploma in the mail...what a disappointment that was, reguardless it is a joy to know she is so close and she has been so successful.
Yesterday, I took my Mother to her first radiation treatment. We were happy to spend time together but it was a long day and she was exhaused.
Yesterday, was a day of extreme emotions. Be blessed.

A Few More Days have passed and Most Bad News

2011-04-23T12:17:00.000-04:00

Well dear friends, time continues to pass and at each visit to the different doctors' offices we find no encouragement. We continue to enjoy spending time with my Mother. She is having many good days and no pain. The doctors are so amazed but I know it is due to prayers of friends and family. I do want to thank you and ask you to continue to pray for her...we are just so thankful for your prayers.
This week we did visit the James Cancer Hospital, which is suppose to be the best in the midwest but they offered us some radiation treatments for her back and chemo in a clinical trial which we are not considering at this time. They have told us that her time is very short but I know the Lord is the one who numbers our days so with that knowledge we continue to try to spend our days with her. She spends most of her time in a chair or napping in her bed. This is almost unbearable if you saw her last October, before they went to Florida, working in her gardens and spending her time with her family.
I spend my days helping her as I can and at the same time trying to hold my family together. We continue to plan for two graduation parties and I must say we have some amazing friends who have offered to help with some of the details. Sometimes I address the envelopes in between tears...praying that we will all be there for both of my daughters graduations.
Spring is just beginning to show it's face here. We are having may cold days and much rain but once in a while the sun peeks out to give us a hope of days to come. I have a few tulips popping and a few flowering trees and many leaves to rake but it is Ohio and that is just the way it is.
Tomorrow is Resurrection Sunday and I am so thankful that Jesus took our place on that cross that we may spend all eternity with Him. We rejoice that the grave is empty!!! We covet your prayers for our beloved Mother.

Trying to Make It Through Each Day

2011-04-19T20:15:00.000-04:00

First of all dear friends, I would like to tell you how much I appreciate your prayers. I can not tell you how much that means to me. I know that prayer is always the answer and I am more than grateful and thankful. I know that each of our lives is held in God's hand and sometimes our heart gets broken. His ways are beyond our understanding and that is where true faith steps in. But that doesn't mean it is easy.
Yesterday I was telling you that my parents were in Florida when they found out she was really sick. Within the week my parents were back in Ohio. We took her to the family doctor and he reviewed the MRI and sent her on for more tests. So for 4 days in a row we were taking Mom for tests. She was exhausted and I was almost unable to control my tears. Each of her tests showed terrible results and I have been so devastated. I try to be brave around her but the sadness appears at unexpected times. She tries to comfort us....she has such quiet courage.
I made arrangements with our pastor to anoint her for healing and restoration and this time my youngest was able to go with us. I do know how important it is for our children to see us live out our faith. I do believe in total and complete healing and I also know that healing comes in different ways.
I guess I am selfish. I keep thinking of all the things she would miss. My kids getting married and their children...all the time we spent working in my gardens and shopping and decorating. I know that this isn't about me but I guess I am being honest when I tell you that this is really some of the things that are going through my mind. Mom has always been my best friend. She has always been young and active and willing to help. Most of all, we just like being together no matter what we are doing.
In the midst of all of the tests I want to share that I have been so torn. My oldest is graduating from college and she has had such great success. The day after the biopsy for my Mom was awards day for my daughter on her campus. My heart churned. How can I be so happy and so sad. How do I deal with such extreme emotions. I wanted to jump for joy, to shout out loud because I am so proud of her and all her success. She was beaming...a shiny star..a day of joy. Oh Lord...my heart...the pain...the joy..the tears...how do I survive?
But my Mom was determined to go for the awards so we found a wheelchair. Now let me just say...I have never had anyone around me in a wheelchair and I was nervous about pushing her around campus but God is good and my dh had the day off work and was able to attend. I am blessed that he took that burden off of me so I could enjoy our daughter and my Mother.
Now, I will share a few of those pictures but I am not at my computer, I am at my Mom and Dad's house so when I get home tomorrow I will post pictures of that day. My Mother beamed all day long..she fought through being tired and enjoyed the day. It was sunny and warm and we took her all over the campus and she was delighted. That day, April 13, was my Dad's birthday so on the way home she asked us to stop and pick up a present for him. She is kind and giving.
And again, her tests results came back bad..and I feel sheer panic. I try to keep my body calm as my mind races for answers. I am tired but I can't sleep..I pray constantly yet I know our lives are rich in blessings. My Mother is in no pain and that is such a blessing for all of us. I know that I have shared so many rich and wonderful years with my Mother and that she has shown me what is important and how to be a good mom...and how to be a good wife...and for that I am so thankful..so blessed and...so sad.

My daughter and my Mother on awards day. Mom was getting tired but she never complained a single time.

This is our award-winning daughter, my Mother and myself....I was so proud but something happened to my hair...lol

Our youngest daughter and my Mother enjoying a walk around campus in between awards.

Our daughter and her Dad who just happened to have the day off!!!!!!!!!!
I am so happy that we were able to have Mom with us. What wonderful memories we have of this day!
We are so very proud!

Just trying to Survive

2011-04-18T21:18:00.000-04:00

On Monday March 28th, our world changed with a picture on an MRI. If you have followed my blog for very long then you understand that it has always been about projects I am working on or fun little ideas and of course decorating our home. But our lives have changed and so my blog posts are now changing too. I had no intention of this blog being serious and actually I had every intention of blogging about things that are fun.
My children are well on their way to becoming adults. My oldest is graduation from college, my middle daughter is a freshman in college and our youngest is a senior in high school. I have been thinking about opening a small business and I have been looking forward to sharing all my ideas with each of you.
But as we all know, our plans are not always the plans the Lord has and he has placed a hurdle in front of us. A hurdle I don't know how to fight. But this blog has always been about what was happening in my daily life so I will continue to share even when it is unpleasant because I believe we can learn from each other and we can share each others burdens thus the MRI.
On Monday, March 28th, 2011 my wonderful Mother went to hear the results of an MRI she had taken because she was having back pain. We were looking for a bulging disc or maybe she needed a hip replacement but instead the Doctor told her to go home to her family. My parents were in Florida spending the winter. She had helped my Father recuperate from a hip replacement surgery in November so we thought maybe she had hurt herself maybe she needed surgery. But that was not the news, I wish that had been the news.
In an instant my world changed. I was standing the the middle of the gift shop that I work in when I got a call from my father saying that my Mother had a spot on her spine, cancer. He said the doctor kept saying how sorry he was....I was still listening, I was standing still, I thought I was going to vomit. I was in shock. I was scared, I was overwhelming sad and I was worried. My parents were alone. Our family was in Ohio. I spent the next hour silent. I spent the next hour in shock.
This is just the beginning of our story. Can I say I have cried enough tears to fill a bucket. Can I tell you I have never felt so helpless and alone and lonely and scared? I have been surrounded by family but I feel like I am so isolated that if I really let go I won't be able to control myself. I am praying for healing and restoration and bracing myself for what is to come.
I am a very blessed person and I don't want to leave you with discouragement but if you have a broken heart then you know where I am right now. There have been more developments in our journey...we had to get our parents home to see what we are dealing with. That part of our journey is next. We covet your prayers.

Asking for a Miracle..

2011-04-07T20:29:00.000-04:00

Life changes so quickly....sometimes in a terrible way. When my Mother left for Florida she was a vibrant, lively, self-sufficient woman. She works in her gardens for hours, she paints pictures, she sews, she is always looking for ways to help her children and grandchildren. She is the first to volunteer to help...she is so special...
Now, five months later she has returned to Ohio frail and so very ill. How did this happen? How can years be snatched so quickly? My Mother is a very brave soul and she is in for the fight of her life even as her body is failing her. She is tired, she is sick...she is brave.
Oh Lord, send your healing touch....Lord healing and restoration! Allow our family a miracle...Lord...a miracle! In Jesus Name.

Happy Anniversary!!!!!

2011-03-31T17:36:00.000-04:00

Today is my parents 60th wedding anniversary and in honor of them we received a fresh snowfall so Mom and Dad, this is for you!

A little snow blessing from Heaven ...love you both!

Comfort

2011-03-29T16:42:00.000-04:00

This the power of the Cross
Christ became sin for us
Took the blame
Bore to wrath
We stand forgiven at the cross
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nwzt9jRUPNg

Decisions , Decisions....

2011-03-27T09:50:00.000-04:00

Now that the back porch is almost decorated I have to return to the kitchen. Again, we are making small changes to update the kitchen at this time with homes that eventually we will remodel and put in new cabinets. Last week I posted pictures of my dh taking down the plate rail and most of you agreed that it was a major improvement. So I am moving on the door handles. The one on the left, the black one is what is on all the cabinets right now. I put them on about 1 1/2 years ago. I am thinking about changing them to the one on the right..a brushed nickel handle. So which do you like??? So far I have only purchased just this one until I decide. And don't worry about the black handles, if I do change they will go into one of our rental properties.
I also had dh run some electricity about the cabinets so I could put a small light on top...this is what it looks like right now...just a small night-light bulb that I leave on all the time.

I love the design on the ceiling and it just adds a homey touch. It is white as are most of the decorations that are going into our kitchen.
I also decided to put away all the spices and add a little whimsy...

So there you have it, not much excitement but a little fun. So I am off to church and then resting...well..after a 2 mile walk...resting..before the next thing. Be blessed.

The redecorating has started!!

2011-03-25T08:37:00.000-04:00

Finally, at day three I am done....this is what I have come up with so far! I did not realize I had so many crocks and most of them were already on the porch so with a little reorganizing I think I like it.

This is where I started. Everything was Americana with black. It was a fun theme but the flag was across my kitchen windows and it did make my kitchen dark.

Again, this is how it is decorated today..very simple but I hope it looks welcoming since this is the enclosed porch that everyone steps into when they come to our home...unless you go to the front door.

This has been decorated since the spring of 2009 (I looked at my blog)..and I was ready to lighten up!

As of this morning, I am going to use it like a bakers rack. The silver you see is going to go all the way to the top shelf and it will be the back for the cabinet!! The "food" are candles!

Looks like a big change!

Paint, Paint and More Paint!!!!

2011-03-24T09:16:00.000-04:00

Let me first say...I hate painting. It is not hard, it doesn't take much time, it makes a big impact...but I hate to paint. So what have I been doing the last two days...painting of course!

This is the first coat. And this is where we started...black. I really loved the black but I am so ready for something different and fresh and bright. It has been a long winter and it is only paint...I can always repaint if I don't like it! Right?

After another coat of paint and some walnut stain...this is where I am at right now in the project. This was taken this morning. My wrist is sore from holding a paint brush for two days but it is worth it.
Here is another piece..

This is after the second coat of paint. I then got an idea to spice things up a little so when I was at Lowes I bought this

Since you have to have the first coat in satin paint (which I did) I thought I would give it a try. So I purchased more paint and got started. I read the pamphlet and it said to give it an even coat but the guy at Lowes said to give it an light coat so I went with that, waited two hours and put the paint on. Well, I had wished I had put on a heavier coat because not much happened and I forgot to take a picture of this step...But another thing was that my white paint turned pink. I am assuming it was the red from the black paint...I don't know but I didn't like it so...I broke out the walnut stain and this is what I have now.

The drawers are open because it is still damp but I guess you get the picture...the paint is called sprinkles from Valspar.
I do have a little more painting to do...I am spray painting a chandelier and I need to paint two candle sticks but for now I need to get my walk in, carry out the trash, I have a meeting at 11am and I need to pick up some rubbermaids to put my prims away....hope you are enjoying this little glimpse...more is to come!